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Tacoma’s Too-Big Promotion
April and May 2018 After Richard died, the question was what to do with Tacoma. He couldn’t stay with me, as I’m gone too much. Andy, the owner of Via Elegante, Richard’s last assisted living place, offered to take Tacoma as the house dog for his facility in Sierra...
How the Montessori Method Works in Dementia Care
Many of us are challenged caring for loved ones with dementia in the best of times. These are not the best of times. The below article offers practical advise on using the Montessori method for “patient-centered” care. The model involves patients in decisions about...
The Cold That Killed My Husband
22 April 2017 On March 15, I had a reading with Dr. Pam. Richard had visited her virtually earlier that day and told her that he couldn’t do it and that he wanted to go. His plan was to choke to death. He told her he thought I would be better off without him. That...
Landing the Plane Safely
We have tried some wild stuff and working with Dr. Pam is high on the wild stuff Richter scale. Dr. Pam is a psychic healer and a damn good one. Our main goal is for Richard to “land the plane safely” in this lifetime so that his anxieties, fears, and unresolved...
We Tried Everything
When traditional medicine let us down, we did not give up there. We tried everything. Everything has helped, but nothing has been a cure. That would have been a dream. Here’s the list of the things we have tried: Acupuncture Cognitive therapy Counseling CBD and...
Managing the Change that Nobody Wants
10 October 2016 Article for the Michael J. Fox Foundation and my business blog at Avasbutler.com I’m an organizational development consultant who specializes in helping business leaders achieve transformational change; it’s my life’s calling. But not all change is...
The Last Year
19 April 2016 Richard, today you were standing in the hallway, and you looked like my husband, the old you. That was really wild and beautiful to see, if only for a minute. 6 July 2016 Today is our twenty-fifth wedding anniversary. What a crazy ride. I haven’t written...
Be proactive when your loved one is in assisted living
When my dear husband Richard was in assisted living due to his Parkinson's and Lewy-body dementia, I learned first hand the importance of being proactive in the quality of his care. My attention to details and follow up to ensure expectations were met made a big...
New Dementia Tools from Compassion and Choices
Compassion and Choices https://compassionandchoices.org now offers two excellent and customizable online dementia tools. The Dementia Values and Priorities Online Tool allows users to create a Dementia Healthcare Directive to add to a standard advance directive. This...
What We Can Learn about Lewy-Body Dementia from the Life of Robin Williams
Robin Willams brought a wider understanding of Lewy-body dementia to the world. His wife, Susan Schneider Williams has become an advocate for Lewy-body dementia. Like Susan, I work to find meaning from the experiences my husband Richard and I had. I encourage you...